| Art school all over again |
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| 07:07pm 11/06/2006 |
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I'm producing art for printing onto T-shirts lately. They give me garbage art, I make it shine. It pays better than my day job printing them. Merging the two is going well. My SCA house symbol is next, I'm making it for T-shirts and taberds.
SCA has been going well. I enjoy my time there. Unfortunately my helm is out for repairs. I'm getting it resized to add more padding. Let's face it, a 6 foot stick to the noggin can be a bit jarring. Better still to be the one doing the jarring, but it can't always be that way.
Electricity free games have been my new thing. I have a growing collection of different card games as well as some great beer and peanuts board games. Hurricanes be damned, I'll go down rolling! Who's with me? |
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| Hookers With Dirty Magazines... |
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| 07:37pm 08/04/2005 |
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So... this beat up prostitute walks into my store. she has several grocery store style plastic bags bulging with who knows what in her hands and she has a definite look of "crazy eyes". her sagging breasts are prominently on display through her transparent shirt and the big blue shiner on her eye screams "I cheat my pimp".
she asks me if I have a trash can. I say yes, but it's at my house. you can use the one outside that door there. so she lurches off in her miasma of mental illness leaving in her wake some of the goods she wished to be rid of. some totsie rolls and paper and some other stuff on the floor behind the counter that I couldn't see.
while she's off, a customer brings up some videos to rent, you know "ass army" "more than a woman" and "gilligans BI-land" that sort of thing. but the remarkable bit is this little "clack" noise that comes from something his foot hit on the floor. I lean over the edge and what do I behold but a fully loaded 9mm magazine laying on the floor. oh joy! what a treat!
the hooker stumbles back in leering and giggling with her head lolling around in the most obvious display of schizo I've seen in the jack shack for a week or two at least. she just grabs it and continues on her merry way.
at this point I think it best to notify my fellow co-worker, a lovely young woman who we will call punky-brewster for lack of a better name. so punky, not being as worldly as myself, asks me what we should do. normally when we have a trouble customer we ban them by taking a polaroid of them and then asking them to leave. in this case however, flashing bright lights into the face of an obviously deranged, and quite possibly heavily armed, prostitute is not such a good idea. "continue the transaction as normal" I say to her, a strange choice of words in hind sight but that's what came to mind.
the Semen Demon Succubus (from here on in referred to as SDS) left without any further problems and we breathed a sigh of relief. that is, until I noticed her harrassing a customer who had just left as well. I went outside to get her to leave him alone just in time to see she was driving off in his passenger seat. she rolled own the power window and gave me that same weird leering grin out the window as she was whisked away for some rectal recreation. oh lord, that poor bastard, I could only hope he knew what he was doing.
one question remained unanswered... what had she thrown away?
my morbid imagination started coming up with all kinds of nightmare scenarios from human heads to aborted fetus' and I knew it was going to be necessary to go about the unpleasant task of investigating the trash bin. on went the latex gloves and in I dove for the truth, the whole truth and if god was on my side, not much more than the truth.
I was lucky and there was little garbage inside already other than what the SDS had thrown away herself. the contents were as follows:
on pair of mens khaki pants, tiny meat cleaver in left hand pocket (drug paraphenelia is my geuss, espescially since I found a dirty little mirror too)
one long sleeve t-shirt
one pair spandex sports shorts
one sports jersey
the 9mm magazine, still fully loaded
well the scenario was pretty clear at this point, to me anyway. she had held up several men after picking them up for tricks, taken all their money and left them naked (but probably alive) in some hotel room somewhere, and now my loyal, if misguided, customer was going to join them in poverty and nudity.
oh well, his loss.
later that morning the prodigal prostitute returned! this time I was alone because punky brewster had left early for the night and without an innocent to watch out for I was emboldened to ban this two legged train wreck.
I say to her innocently "may I take your picture madam?" trying to sounds as neutral as possible. her reply, which I don't remember verbatim, was something along the lines of "yes, but give me a second, we don't all like to be photographed" something hinting at multiple personality disorder. it was creepy. so I get her picture acting as if I'm flattering her and then after she leaves again I just stick her face up on the ban list for the next shift to deal with because I have had about enough of her, digging through the trash, and dealing with armed whores.
naturally I kept the magazine as a souvenir. another dull night at the jack shack. |
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Read 6 - Post |
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| 09:58pm 20/11/2004 |
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I'm a big fan of buffets.
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| holy junior mechanic batman |
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| 12:59pm 19/11/2004 |
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driving the 1987 ford tempo has taught me many things. like for instance that mechanics are expensive. to show that I have learned this lesson, I have started doing all the work on it myself.
so far I have replaced the water pump, starter, several belts that have been chewed up by it, and have started doing my own oil changes.
todays project includes rewiring the cooling fan on the radiator and tightening the hand brake so that it actually makes the car not move. I have high hopes for these endeavors.
I also bought a set of temperature, pressure, and voltage gauges for the tempo. these will require a little study of the manual to find exactly where to hook them up at but will make for a great project next week.
viva la home mechanica! |
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| 3-D animation and relationship resuscitation |
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| 09:28am 07/10/2004 |
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I've been hard at work since I last updated my journal. I created a pair of mexican beans for an animation that I call frijoles locos, more on that as it develops. I also have decided to start working on a bunny animation specifically for Bunny since she and I have started dating again.
we went out last week and both had the most horrible date ever. I couldn't stand her at all by the next day and she felt the same, but for some odd reason she decided to call me and ask me to come back. I have no idea what's going on in her head but I'm willing to give it a couple more shots to try to get us out of the defensive non-commital arms length mode and back into the forgiving generous loving mode.
I'm going to try to really give her some romance in the hopes that maybe this time she'll give it back in kind. elaborate creative dates are the rule and we're taking turns footing the bill and coming up with ideas. here's to hoping the evil scientist has a heart worth holding onto. I'm sure she's wondering the same about me. |
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| Sadness Before The Fact |
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| 06:10pm 10/09/2004 |
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my favorite baby cat is dying. I've had twitchy since I was young and she's going to die soon. she's slowly losing weight and I know that means she's getting ready for kitty hospice soon. I wish I hadn't had to leave her with my parents so that I could have had more time with her the past few years. she was happier there though and wouldn't have been allowed outside anywhere I moved to. she's had a good run of the whole kitty thing. she got to have a litter of kittens before we fixed her and she was a real fatty for quite some time. she's a short haired shed monster that I used to say I could make ten more cats out of from just the fluff that came off her while petting. I've always been her daddy even when I wasn't around as much. she knew when she saw me that she was in for some affection. when she had her litter she wouldn't do it without me by her side and tried to have them under the dinner table when I finally left to get something to eat during the ordeal. she's been a good friend and I hope I was too. I'll have to make the difficult decision of when to put her to sleep if she experiences pain as she passes. I am not looking forward to it but know it's what's best sometimes. I know I've got a picture of her when she was healthy somewhere in my photo collection but I don't have time to share it right now and her current appearence is too gaunt for me to be proud of. I hope she has lots of pain free time left but I can tell it's coming soon.
I will miss you my friend.
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Read 2 - Post |
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| Drunken Shenanigans of the Homeless |
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| 08:11am 22/08/2004 |
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saturday nights at the adult "book" store are always a blast. this week I not only had my usual set of scary hairy male and lonely older female admirers, I also had a homeless guy pay ME instead of the other way around.
it all started with me pointing out a sign on the counter to a bedraggled looking customer. it said "we're out of smokes and it's no joke". well this guy gives us (the other night watchman and I) a half a pack of 305 menthol 100's. no prize by far but a lot better than our current alternatives. I'm broke because I'm moving and he's broke because god only knows what he spends his money on.
a few minutes pass, and this guy comes back and starts watching our chess game we have going on. after staring for a while and making absurd slurred strategical suggestions he decides he needs beer. not only does he need beer but he also needs a ride to get it. so he asks if yours truly could putter him on down to the quicky mart for a fresh batch of suds. of course I can't, I'm on the clock and this guy already looks trashed. so he sweetens the deal and offers me cash.
so of course I end up driving to the store with this indigent crammed into the back of my car along with a bunch of my belongings bound for the storage space in the morning while he goes on and on about how I look like john stamos.
his transaction at the store comes along with some yelling, the clerks making fun of him and all 3 of us getting a good chuckle, and then it's vroom vroom back to labor land and my job, ten dollars richer for five minutes time. he insists we take some of the beer, so now there's five beers warming in the corner of my new apartment as I type this.
he goes into the back to watch some movies and we think nothing more of him.
sneezing fits are heard in the back, repetitive and worrying levels of sneezing. what the hell?
quiet at last. he must've finally gotten the cock out of his nose.
so all is good in luscivious lollipop land right? wrong. one of the other customers comes up to the counter from the video arcade in the back to tell us that someone's passed out in there. not in a video booth, but actually sprawled out in the hallway blocking foot traffic.
one geuss who it is.
so I grab the head crackin/eye blindin maglight we save for this kind of thing and venture back there to straighten things out as best I can while keeping in mind that this guy just gave me five beers and ten bucks for what amounted to nothing.
lo and behold, he's the one that's been sneezing too. I can see thick trails of mucus leading to his nostrils glistening on the cold cummy tile. I'm a little worried, what if this guy sniffed some H in one of those booths and gacked right there in m fucking store. great, I say to myself, this is how I wanted to spend the weekend, poking a stiff with a maglight while I wait for the cops.
that's when I realise that he's breathing, slowly. I'm still a little concerned about our mutual futures at this point and try to rouse him using the usual techniques. flashlight in the eyes did nothing, making loud echoing whoop whoop whoop noises was similarly useless, and pushing his limbs around with the toe of my boot was only grossing me out. it was time to bust out the big guns.
I took a moment to consider pepper spray when I realised I had a bottle of water in the fridge that was even colder than the tile he was laying on.
the chinese water torture worked with phenominal results. soaking wet and still drunk as hell he stumbled out of the store.
last I see of him? of course not!
he comes back an hour later and offers me more cash to drive him to the labor ready work force place to make some money. well I certainly can't turn this down after all he's done for us and so I make myself a total of seventeen dollars, five cans of natural ice, and a good chuckle at someone else's expense off of the entire nights transactions.
now I'm home, and tired as hell. another work day completed. |
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| No Prostitutes Please |
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| 02:53pm 20/08/2004 |
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well I signed up for the $250 a month pad today. I was completely unsurprised when I saw that one of the contractual rental requisites was that "no prostitutes are allowed onto the premises". so unlike all those other apartment complexes that encourage prostitution. I'm glad they let me know this was a problem.
unfortunately that really takes a bite out of my plans for this weekend, but with the money I'm saving on rent I can double my ho consumption, if only I had someplace to take them.
on a lighter note, I think moving in the summertime with a car that has to run the heater to keep from melting the engine is definitely a recipe for heatstroke. I am dyin mofuckah!
wanna know the bonus? my dad is letting me borrow his truck to help me and bunny move. wanna extra double plus bonus? it too has a problem where the heater must be run to keep the engine from melting. DOUBLER PLUS SUOPER DUPER HISCORE? THE POWER WINDOWS DON'T WORK AND YOU'RE SEALED INSIDE WITH THE HEAT! YAYAYAYAY!!! |
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| hi ho da merry yo a moving we will go |
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| 10:58am 20/08/2004 |
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I looked at a place that's 400 a month and I was impressed. it's slummy looking but almost twice as big as the space bunny is getting. unfortunately they want $100 more of a deposit than my feeble brain had remembered them asking last time I checked and so I'm short on funds. :^/
I will likely move into a REALLY slummy place I found that's under $250 a month for a couple months while I pay off my electric and phone bills, save up a deposit for a better apartment (I want a gym and pool with my efficiency, thanks), and get my car repaired before it falls apart at the seams.
the place is super scuzzy. I will share a bathroom and kitchen with 2 other ppl and so I basically can't have anything nice, or even frozen food for that matter.
hanging with the neighbors is right out. the tv is nothing nice so it isn't a big deal but the xbox will have to be snuck into the place inside a cardboard box or something. I will play it only with my headphones on so nobody can hear that I have it in there.
it's crappy but I will be able to save money much more quickly there and sometimes you just gotta bite the bullet in favor of getting a better future secured more quickly. the debts that would take me a year to pay off at the $400 place will take me a few months to pay off at the $250 place and that's a serious bonus. the faster I pay off those debts and save some cash, the faster I can get a nicer place with a gym and pool so that I can live better and get into shape at no extra charge.
I'll take this time to storyboard out my recent 3-D animation ideas and work on some new ones. once I have a decent machine to animate with I will have some mad funny ready to go and only need the modeling and animation slapped together.
all in all, I'm pretty excited to move into the ghetto, because it is a means to an end which I am greatly looking forward too. whether this end includes bunny (or any partner at all for that matter) remains to be seen, but I am hopeful that I can be successful at both wrangling my career back into shape as well as my social life.
I am envigorated and inspired by this move. if only it weren't so damn HOT!!! |
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| I hate moving |
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| 02:06pm 19/08/2004 |
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bunny and I are moving apart from each other. it's been really weird because neither of us seems to know if we want to keep dating or not. at least, that's the vibe I get from her, and when I get that vibe it puts me into a funk and then I don't want to date her anymore either (but really I do).
we're both on the defensive right now trying not to get hurt. it's hard to do without hurting the other person. it also leads to a lot of misunderstandings that could have been avoided. we're both jumping back and forth between sadness, false cheer, and fear because everything seems to be falling apart.
often lately I find myself wishing we were moving into a smaller place together instead of two small places apart. that's something I'd wanted, and which had stressed us out financially, for a long time now. I have what I wanted but without bunny, not the tradeoff I had in mind. she's a real pain in the ass sometimes but I love her more than anyone else I've been with. and who isn't a pain in the ass sometimes? I know I can't claim that title.
but on the flipside, part of me thinks we really need time and a little space to ourselves if we're going to make this love last between us for a lifetime. we were on a bad swing and it we both wanted to swing back but it's hard when you're both always home together without a break. so we're trying some space, it's scary and I'm afraid of losing her, but I hope it will work out for the best.
if you love someone, you have to let them go.
if they love you, they'll come back.
it's a lot easier to say than it is to do. |
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| Best Weekend Ever! |
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| 11:41am 15/12/2003 |
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bunny is talking to me again, I have a chance to save our love. we spent the entire weekend together and everything went very well. some personal improvements need to be made but goals have been set and action has begun.
there is a xmas party at a friends house this weekend, hopefully the schedule is clear. |
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| 07:37am 10/12/2003 |
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my mother told me that no matter what happens, god has a plan for me.
apparently gods plan is for my true love and I to seperate suddenly and painfully just before our birthdays during the christmas season.
she says she doesn't want her presents but I'd rather give them to her. I bought them for her after all. I had been shopping since before halloween to get her cute gifts. all that time I spent thinking about her. now it's all for nothing.
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Read 2 - Post |
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| a sparkle of light in an otherwise dark time |
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| 06:38pm 09/12/2003 |
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just finished my final for the algebra class I was taking. I'm certain I scored mad boo-yah all over it. I also got my last two tests back today... 99 and 100 on each of them. it seems I have a nack for this math stuff, maybe I should look further into where I can go with it. I'm reading "timeline" right now, it's interesting. I probably won't bother to see the movie but the book is pretty good so far, combining quantum physics and ancient history together it has totally caught me and now I'm ravenously reading. the reading also helps me keep my mind off how badly I feel. I am having to make a very hard change in my life that hurts deeply but will ultimately be for the greater good, I hope. I can't help but feel that I'm losing the most important person in my life no matter how I try to slice it and look at the bright possible futures. this is going to be one of my life's great regrets and I know it. but what else can I do? I wish there was a better answer. |
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| Up and Down on the Potamus Rollercoaster of Love |
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| 11:11pm 13/11/2003 |
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bunny and I had an argument over school today. I got backlogged on my homework a couple weeks ago and haven't been able to get caught up since. it seems like they give me so much homework that even if I spend 6 hours straight a night twice a week while I'm at work doing homework instead of working I still manage to end up behind. that's 12 hours straight a week (at least), and another 4 while I'm actually at class. 16 hours a week not being enough for the homework of this one class is absurd. time is a huge commodity now with me working full time, going to school, and spending all my time with bunny when we're both off at once. my test scores are up in the 90+ percent but the homework is weighing me down and really fucking with me and, now with bunny getting angry with me over it, it's fucked up my relationship too. I really wish I'd never gone back to school at all now and just spent my spare time working on my computer skills, 3-D, and sewing like I wanted to instead of trying to be what she wanted me to be.
I wanted very badly to please her and be good enough for her but yet doing so is just tearing us apart. I'd rather just work a normal nine to five and spend my time with her and be in love than work hard for some indefinite future I never wanted in the first place. the pressures of being in love with a research scientist are something that could make up a huge entry all their own.
school seems like it will result in me making more money but being without my bunny rabbit. I did this because I wanted to be good enough for her, but now I find myself praying she won't leave me.
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| Nelly Needs Negation |
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| 04:22pm 10/11/2003 |
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it looks like the new guy at work isn't going to cut it. the only thing keeping him there as far as I can tell is his need for a job and our combined pity for him. he's your typical run-of-the-mill complete fuck up type trash.
among the complaints against him:
he uses racial slurs while customers are in ear shot, not that it's ok to use them when they aren't, but he's just that stupid. he touches and fiddles with his penis while he talks to me and the other employees nearly constantly which is starting to make me wonder if he has crabs or a fantasy about me. he's used the word faggot a few times right in front of jacob who happens to be our only (openly) gay employee. add to that his complete inability to grasp the very simple responsibilities assosciated with operating an adult novelty store such as counting and sorting and you get the mung faced mongoloid mouth breathing moron who we have dubbed "nelly" and who none of us wants to work with. mind you the customers are generally bad enough but this guy is low class even for the type of person who frequents glory holes in search of faceless man sex. what my boss is thinking hiring some of these people is truly beyond me. probably the same thought process that told him jalapeno flavored sexual lubricant would be a big seller (we've gotten rid of one bottle in the year I've worked here, we can't even give it away). I am going to revitalize this journal which I have left dead on the vine for so long by describing my day to day activities as a porn store clerk and all the glamor and glitz that comes with my title as senior staff. until then, good day. |
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Read 3 - Post |
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| The Long Silence Ends |
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| 11:18pm 29/10/2002 |
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I haven't said jack shit to this damn log for a while now. I've been maxin and relaxin all serious like havin good times with my baby. her name is bunny and she rocks my casbah like tom jones. she makes a lot more cash than me but I try to keep up when we go out together. it's hard sometimes, makes me feel like I'm not pulling my weight. that's the only snag we've hit so far really and she's been cool about trying to keep our adventures within my range of spending. you can't ask for more than that. someone who is aware of your drawbacks and willing to help you work around them is a definite keeper.
she likes to camp just like I do. we'll be going to our first SCA event together next weekend. she wants to see cirque de sole' as well but it'll be hard for me to get the money in time. looks like some e-bay is in my near future if I want to make it to that particular event.
but about that SCA event... the lord of my household is being crowned king of trimaris. I absolutely have to make it to this event or else I'm in the deepest shit imaginable. my lord has been knighted, won crown tourney, and been married all without my attendance. I am the worst man at arms EVER!!!
ok, that's all you get tonight. except that I'm reading the grapes of wrath right now and it seems pretty cool so far.
ciao |
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| Adventures In Public Transit |
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| 05:11pm 26/08/2002 |
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I waited around for about fifteen or twenty minutes at the campus for the number six bus while I tried not to eyeball all the kids in shorty shorts too conspicuously. hopped on and bought myself an all day pass to public transportation nirvana. only three dollars for all the bliss you can grab with one hand while hanging on for dear life with the other. I took six to the transit center and switched to thirty three instead of my usual bus which is number one. I rode thirty three while I sketched some more, grabbed the power up, saved the princess, won the game. ever wonder why eleven isn't called onety one? cuz it sounds a damn lot like twenty one, which wouldn't be a problem if it were twoty two. who comes up with this shit? anyway, I headed towards northdale on the threety three until I got to the Y. several spurts of energy later I was exhausted, breathing heavy, and totally wet. not my favorite way to achieve that state of being but it had to do in a pinch. to reward the ten or twenty calories I burned on the ellipticle and doing my usual lat pull, bench press, military press, curl, row combo I decided to go to the chinese buffet one block away. about two thousand calories into the buffet my hunger fades (this is plate two) and I start to realise this is one of the absolute worst buffets I have ever had the displeasure of experiencing. the sushi was at least a day old, I felt like a daredevil just eating the vegetarian sushi they had sitting out like rat bait. with all the fried scallops (they were fried chicken, who do they think they're fooling?) and the soupy general tso chicken I think the teriyaki chicken on a stick really shined through as the least offensive dish they had available. anything on a stick is gold as far as I'm concerned, you could even sell me poop on a stick. it means I don't have to get any on me and I can think of a few people or places that could really use a good dose of fecal finger painting sans the fingers. the tea was a nice blend as well, but there's not much to that. how do you fuck up boiling water? one thing I noticed that struck me as odd was the lack of beef. there was no beef at all anywhere. pork, chicken, some shrimp, but no beef. I think the reason the chinese was so bad there was because they only had chinese waiters, the cooks must have been converted hindus. maybe they were chinese hindus, I don't give a shit. all PC stuff aside the food sucked open ass and religious freedom is no excuse for poisoning me. I'll pass on the purple kool-aid and the same goes for the week old salmon rolls. plate three was a practice in dietary self mutilation. I tipped the nice lady who kept bringing me water because she smiled a lot and never spat in my food. they probably took care of all the spitting in the kitchen before the food hit the bar. outside I was greeted once again by the unwelcome august florida heat. and what luck! it was about to rain. I sat dutifully at the bus stop day dreaming about police trying to escort me out of a building charging me with loitering for trying to get out of the rain. I often daydream about police charging me with frivolous and unwarranted crimes. these daydreams always end with my swift deadly and completely unrealistic kung fu moves which would render them mewling helpless piles of shattered power tripping ex-megalomaniac. the bus came before the rain, there was never any rain at all actually other than a few sprinkles. really crashed my plans for sticking one to the man. fortunate in actuality because the only sticking going on would be me, into a cruiser, for verbally assaulting an officer. another long bus ride to the USF terminal and a few more sketches. I get on the number one, some really stinky black guy who smells like he just took a dump sits in front of me. instead of getting up and finding a new seat I use it as inspiration for my next drawing which was also influenced by the dog I recently saw crapping on the side of the road. I called it "pooping in the park". I'll start bidding at five thousand dollars and we can work from there. that nasty fucker never got off either, not as far as I know anyway. I jumped ship by the bowling alley down the street from my house and hit them up for a job application. I've always held a secret urge to be a pro ball shiner, shining real honest to god pro balls. a quick jaunt home and here I am sipping a beer typing all this for you. |
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| Missing the boat |
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| 02:56pm 25/08/2002 |
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I hate cars, why can't we all just ride horses instead? My machine is down ith a bad fuel pump and will remain down for quite some time because money does not allow for repairs. this normally wouldn't be so bad but I was REALLY hoping to make it to the SCA event this weekend. Crown tourney and here I am not able to see my knight fight for it. If he becomes king I am in for some serious shit when I finally get back into it. It's more than bad enough that I missed his knighting, which is a relatively big deal for that scene.
curses. |
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potamus's journal